It has to always be like this. Nothing went well at all. Sooner or later I'm going to die in my own negativity. No matter how hard I tried, it's still the same. How easy it is to be a good human being? When everything, and I mean everything I do, everything thing that I thought was the right thing to do seems to be the wrong thing. Somebody please tell me what's the best I could do? I mean seriously I don't know what to do anymore.
I don't know what is the gist of so called I should think what is more important at the moment when I'm deciding. You tell me whether I should be selfish or care for other people feeling? Do I really have to always says no when deep down inside I don't really want to change my plan to allow others people plan to work?
Here's what's going the wrong way, when I think its fine to ruin myself rather than ruining other people feeling, I'll be considered as wrong by her, she say I have to care about her more. Yet when I'm there for her she doesn't even bother my existence. In the end, I ruin another people feeling as well as mine.
No matter what I do I just have to ruin someone feeling. Am I happy with that? No... So why I'm still exist? Because I still think I have to care for people who I think care for me. Even so, I still think I'm up for no good.
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